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It all started with a dream. My wife,
Susan, and I were lying in bed. We had both had tiring days at work and a busy evening. I
turned to her, before going to sleep, and said I love you. As it was our custom, she
would respond with I love you too and we would kiss and cuddle a little before sleep. But
she did neither. The silence was unbearably obvious. After a few moments, I asked do
you still love me and She said no. She said I do not feel love and so I cannot rest until
I have found love again. I replied the love I feel for you cannot rest without your love.
And I awoke from the dream. I looked at the alarm clock. It read 3:16 a.m.
The windows were open to a mid summer evening. There was a mild cool breeze gently pushing
back the curtains allowing entry of the sound of crickets outside our window. We
live in the country and nights are very quiet during pleasant seasons. I could hear her
slow deep breathing beside me. Her presence was comforting, somewhat reassuring. Her night
gown, as often would happen, had slipped up during the night and the soft flesh of her
back side gently press against my skin. I felt a mild sensuous feeling.
Restless from the dream, I got out of bed and leaned into the screen window to smell the
night air more fully. The night seemed so liberating. I imagined that, at these
darkest hours, I could be freer to travel under the cover of night. I tried to imagine
what I would say to her. Love is the smile of God. Love me and you will have loved God, I
said aloud into the night as a wish to a star.
Despite the exhilaration of the night air, the dream hung about me with its unsettling
presence, like muggy air one cannot escape. But, never mind, I thought. I would be very
tired in the morning so I crawled back into bed. My movements seemed to have awakened
Susan. She turned towards me and said is there anything wrong sweetheart. I said do you
still love me. She said of-course I love you now lets go back to sleep. And we did.
I am a person who enjoys the challenge of change. I can be like this because I have
certain common routines that are never altered. It was my habit to go out, at lunch time,
to escape the visual monotony of my office. My place of work is a 10 ft. square cubicle in
a sea of cubicles on the 10th floor of my employer's office building in the centre of the
city. The day after the dream, I went to my usual table at a café just down the
street. There was an unusually large number of tourists in the area and their
presence disturbed my tranquil spot. A crowd of them came into the café looking for
seats, any seat. To my |
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